Sex and Routine: Rediscovering Desire in Everyday Life

Sex and Routine: Rediscovering Desire in Everyday Life

In a world where the fast pace of daily life intertwines closely with couple cohabitation, maintaining passion and sexual desire can pose a significant challenge. Routine, differing libidos between partners, work stress, and the dynamics of living together can gradually diminish the initial spark. However, effective strategies exist for preserving and reinvigorating mutual attraction, exploring both known and yet-to-be-discovered pleasures.

Finding Pleasure in Routine

Routine does not necessarily have to be an enemy of passion. On the contrary, it can become fertile ground for rediscovering and deepening the understanding of personal and shared pleasure. Sex, while a fundamental aspect, is not the sole driver of passion. Exploring each other through new experiences, conversations, and shared moments can be an intriguing journey towards the rediscovery of desire.

Desire: An Endless Journey

Desire, from the Latin "de sidus -ĕris" - towards the stars, represents a tension towards something that does end once achieved. It is fueled by anticipation, novelty, and stimulation. It differs from libido, which is seen as sexual energy, and from attraction, which defines whom we wish to direct this energy towards. Recognizing the dynamism of desire and its independence from sexual acts is the first step towards a more fulfilling and less mechanical sexuality.

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Communication and Curiosity: Keys to Desire

The lack of communication and routine can lead to a decrease in desire. Acts of kindness, surprises, and taking care of the relationship are essential for keeping the spark alive. It is crucial to ask and discover what ignites the partner's desire, remembering that the responsibility for the sexual life is shared 50% in the couple.

For exemple: if your partner like to discover new things, why not schedule one night for both of you? You could prepare a proper date with some spicy ending: kissing for long, trying new dildos or a strapon, new types of stimulations like pegging and why not starting with a nice massage. 

Novelty and Anticipation: Recipes Against Monotony

Finding a balance between familiarity and novelty is essential. Women, in particular, may require a degree of unpredictability to maintain interest. Not focusing solely on orgasm, but valuing the entire sexual experience, can prove to be a winning strategy. Scheduling intimate moments might seem counterintuitive, but anticipation and preparation enrich the experience, nourishing desire. For instance, introducing sexting is a very nice idea.

Time Management and Initiative

In the life of a stable couple, finding time for sexuality requires effort and planning. One should not fall into the trap of considering sex a duty or a performance to be completed in a set time. Instead, it is an opportunity to cultivate intimacy and connection, a moment worth creating dedicated spaces for.


On the journey towards maintaining passion in the routine of a couple, it's crucial to remember that desire is a garden that requires constant care and attention. Open communication, mutual curiosity, and the ability to surprise each other are key elements for deep and lasting intimacy. Rediscovering pleasure together, exploring new dimensions of sexuality, and maintaining high sexual self-esteem can transform routine from an enemy to an ally of the couple.

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